By way of context, I am a very picky eater, especially regarding vegetables of any sort. It may be the slimy texture, it may be the [alleged] health benefits, it may be my own subtle protest against the brutal farmer's market monopoly, but there it is. I don't eat vegetables. Or fruit if I can help it.
So tonight, as Saydi was off doing more important things, I was caring for my children in my usuual competent and caring manner by baking a frozen pizza for dinner. After sitting down and saying grace [note to self: are frozen foods considered 'pre-blessed' the same way fast food is?] Hazel shouts 'DAD! WE DON'T HAVE ANY SALAD!'
She was very insistent, so I tried to explain that while her mother always made salad, there were other ways of eating vegetables than salad. Like french-fried, for instance.
'NO! DAD! WE HAVE TO HAVE SALAD!'
I compromised by offering some baby carrots and apple slices. She seemed mollified, so I got them out while the pizza cooled off. Hazel and Charlie are sitting there chowing down on their baby carrots and apple slices (and pecking tentatively at their pizza) when I'm thinking to myself 'what is wrong with this picture?'
Just then Hazel says 'I want broccoli'.
Incredulous, I tell her 'No. You eat your pizza first and then you can have some broccoli'.
She takes another small bite of her pizza and says 'I WANT BROCCOLI, DADDY.'
What is wrong with this kid? My patience wearing thin, I say 'Momma bought this deluxe self-rising pizza for $3.99 at Stop&Shop for us, and you are going to eat it, young lady!'
So I finally caved and got them each two 'little trees' of broccoli which they ate with gusto while their pizza got cold.
What is this world coming to...