Life is pretty crazy around here this time of year. I feel strings pulling me in every direction. My heart wants to be out frolicking in the leaves or hiking the fells with my kids, but my body and brain need to be tied to the computer editing pictures, or doing laundry or keeping up with the whirlwind that is our life these days.
So, since I can’t stop the storm, I’m trying to take a step back and recognize the beauty in it. My mom always talks about how, with nine little kids, she tried to be the eye of the hurricane. How in the heck? I haven’t mastered that one yet --instead I’m often the wind that seems to set off the hurricane. So I’ve decided to start on a more basic level – just get above the storm enough to see that there is lots to be thankful for in this messy chaos. 
It seems hard to see the beauty in the everyday, because we see it every day.
“Gratitude does not lead to happiness; gratitude is happiness in its most obtainable form." – Richard Eyre
I know, I’m quoting my dad….but I firmly believe this is true. Gratitude is happiness. I know that the times I’ve been the happiest in my life are the times I’ve been focused on the good, grateful for what I have, able to see the extraordinary in the ordinary. But, obtainable dad? How, in this crazy mess of motherhood can I obtain that thankful, happy perspective? Some days it feels beyond reach. But I do believe he’s right, it is obtainable, with effort. Nearly everything worthwhile takes deliberate effort.
So, here are some things I’m going to try this season in honor of Thanksgiving:
- Take time each day to be present for just 45 seconds with each person in my family. I am thankful when I am present, drinking in the now.
- Write down three things I’m thankful for at the end of the day.
- Stop to pray at least once during the day when I notice something particularly beautiful in my life to thank God for those little, often unnoticed beauties.
- Limit social media. And when I do check in on friends and family on Instagram let their images remind me of my own blessings (such great friends and family) rather than make me covet theirs. And post things I’m thankful for. (see power of mom’s thanksgiving challenge here).
- Write a few thankful emails to friends and family and encourage my family to do this on November Sundays.
My parents just published a new book all about Gratitude. It’s sitting on my coffee table and makes my kids feel like rock stars since there are lots of pictures of them in it. It’s such a great reminder than this is the season to really bulk up my gratitude muscles. And I get to give one away!
Here’s what my dad and mom have to say about it:
In our family, Thanksgiving has always been the "key" holiday. So many of our traditions have centered on Thanksgiving, and we always felt it was the perfect lead-in to Christmas and the perfect harbinger of the holidays. After all, what could be a better precursor to Christmas and to celebrating the birth of Christ than all kinds of gratitude and Thanks-Giving!
Early in our marriage, we decided that rather than get into the Christmas Card frenzy, we would jump the gun a bit and send out a Thanksgiving Card each year. We have done that now for 44 years, and the cards actually tell the story of our family. The pictures that went with the cards each year show the growing up of each child, and the poems we wrote to go with the photos trace the pattern of what had happened each year and where our gratitude was centered.
Finally, as Thanksgiving continued to mean more and more to us, we decided to write a book about gratitude, and about the connections of Thanks-Giving to Joy, to Peace, and to family security and unity. Since much of what we wanted to say was about feelings, we felt the book needed to be as much about pictures as about poetry and prose. Luckily, we have some great photographers in the family, and we were able to use their work to illustrate the book.
As it was finished this fall THE THANKFUL HEART has become not only a how-to book on the ways to enhance and magnify gratitude, but a kind of short hand history of the Eyre family (Eyrealm as we call it) and we could think of no better way to start "getting it out" than on our wonderful daughters' blogs. The publisher has agreed to a little give away where you can comment on this blog and go into a drawing for free copies. And for those who don't win a book (we've never won a drawing in our lives) it is now on sale at Amazon HERE.
Hope you love it, Linda and Richard Eyre
I get to give away one copy! And if you’ve made it to my blog you’ll have a much better chance of winning thank you would on my sisters’ wildly popular blogs! (I don’t think many people make it this far into the eyrealm :))
To enter the giveaway, post a comment sharing one thing that you do (or want to do) to cultivate gratitude, to rise above the chaos or mundane and see the beauty in it.
I’ll announce the winner on Thursday, November 13th so we can get that book to you well before Thanksgiving.
Hello, Saydi! I'm finding it hard to be grateful amidst the bustle of life, but find that if I can get a couple quiet minutes outside, with no phone, then I always feel grateful for the beauty of fall and the earth and my family and etc.
ReplyDeleteI am working on expressing more gratitude to family and friends around me.
ReplyDeleteWe're having a special family prayer each week where we express only gratitude without asking for anything.
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ReplyDeleteWhen I am feeling particularly stressed with laundry, cleaning up, the crying, car repairs, etc., I remember that I am immensely blessed. I have so much laundry and clutter on the floor because I have three precious children to be grateful for. I am blessed to have a car, when others have to walk everywhere. It helps me to keep myself in check and realize that the most annoying things are a result of the greatest blessings that I have.
ReplyDeleteEvery morning during the month of November we add a new leaf to our thankful tree. Although my kids are still young, it still makes them aware of all the blessings in our lives especially when it is completed at the end of the month.
ReplyDeleteWe do a thankful tree like many people, and I'm excited about some other ideas that have been shared.
ReplyDeletep.s. I love your blog. I read each of your sisters' blogs too and appreciate the different perspectives you each have based on where you live, what stage of life you're in and challenges you face. But at the same time I also appreciate the similarities in you and your sister's deliberateness in living life and dedication to strengthening families.
I try to notice the beauty of the world around me (and talk about if I am with someone). There is always something to notice and to appreciate. Being mindful and present helps me be truly grateful for the beauty and wonderful people in my life.
ReplyDeleteThis time of year, I always think of Helen Keller. She wondered "what would happen if a ray of a ray of light" came into her darkness, or a sound rang through her silence. "What would happen?" she thought many a time. "Would my heart stop beating for very excess of happiness?"
ReplyDeleteWe seldom give pause to give thanks for everyday blessings.
I try to concentrate on Gratitude the whole month of November. really should be more the whole year. I try to remember something every night that I am grateful for.
ReplyDeleteIt makes for a peaceful month.
Thank you for keeping it real! Life is busy and sometimes it's just hard to be grateful. As a family, we are attempting to vocalize what we are grateful for each evening around the dinner table.
ReplyDeleteServe and love more
ReplyDeleteIn the craziness of life with four little girls under six, I am making an effort this season to stop amidst the chaos and thank God for the beauty that is underlying it all...because it really all is so beautiful.
ReplyDeleteHi Saydi! :) At dinner every night we go around the table and say "our gratefuls." It ranges from the straightforward ("I'm grateful for this pesto") to the random ("I'm grateful for legoman!") to the incredibly sweet ("I'm grateful for Mommy because she snuggles me"). The boys aren't always into it, but we're trying to stick with it, in hopes of teaching them just how much we have to be grateful for... Hope you're well!
ReplyDeleteAt my college sorority I started "quality time." At the dinner table each night we'd go around so everyone could share something cool/awesome/special that happened - and if you couldn't think of anything, we'd ask if you enjoyed a hot shower that day :-)
ReplyDeleteI am so thankful that I was raised by amazing parents and extended family who THRIVED on gratitude and showed it for things big and small.
I may be drowning in three boys under four, but WOW is it ever amazing and humbling. A few months ago I remarked to my husband, "You know - I didn't dream big enough!" xo
We have become to "me" focused at our house and have been trying to focus on others. Every night at dinner we each take turns talking about one thing we are grateful for that day and how we have helped someone else. I think it is working - today Hazel threw up after I fed her too much and Kylie ran and grabbed me a rag without me asking. After she gave it to me she told me that she knew it would make me happy. It's awesome!
ReplyDeleteI try to take pictures, but not to the point where I am only seeing life through a camera lens. I just realize that these moments of toddlerhood are fleeting and as I look back on the cute moments we had at the end of the day, the chaos feels further from my mind, and I feel more grateful for the phase of life I am in.
ReplyDeleteLife is crazy with kids, but I learned about gratitude from a companion on my mission. Her prayers were so beautiful and so full of gratitude about the simplest things that I would often take for granted. Now, at dinner we all share something that we are grateful for. At times, my kids have to really think about it until I mention about their bed, or our yard or our 3 bathrooms. (We just moved from a tiny apartment in NYC.) Also at night I will tell them why I am grateful for them. Granted, it's harder on some nights than others, but it changes my heart and brings me closer to them.
ReplyDeleteI point out the beauty in nature to my kids daily. They may roll their eyes, but I have noticed they have started pointing it out too.
ReplyDeleteI'm married with 4 small children so I'm still figuring that out! Our thanksgiving has been with my husbands family ever since we got married. It is simple thanksgiving dinner and few comments there and that. Not much to make it grand but much simpler because you are with your family like it shld be.
ReplyDeleteI want to ask my kids every night before bed for 3 things they are grateful for and 3 things they are good at.
ReplyDeleteOne of my favorite ways to express gratitude is through writing/sending thank you notes. There is nothing quite like a handwritten note to express your gratitude for someone and the influence they've had in your life.
ReplyDeleteHi saydi! We are working on teaching our two year old to say his prayers at night. He is working on the bigger concepts, but what we are focusing on is our nightly "bless yous." These bless you's are his chance to say thank you for all the things that mattered during his day - bless you daddy, bless you miss Erika, bless you monster truck. I love seeing him develop his prayers and reflect in things he was grateful for throughout the day.
ReplyDeleteWhen I pray, or in other quiet moments (they're the easiest times for me to do this), I open my heart to feel God's love. As I feel His love washing over me, I instantly want to praise Him. Then during this "giving and receiving" (this flowing), He's sending inspiration... and I feel this overwhelming *gratitude*... all together in one moment. I completely agree with your father's quote- when I'm feeling this gratitude, I'm so happy I feel I'll burst open if I don't share it. In this moment, I can be grateful for anything... even trials!
ReplyDeleteAnd, in reverse, when I feel grateful for something, I can feel His love so powerfully.
I guess you can say that taking time to pray and focus on feeling God's love cultivates gratitude in my heart, and I'm trying to teach this to my children.
One thing I'm doing this month is posting (somewhat) daily gratitude blog posts. It's helped me recognize all the things in front of me that I fail to express thankfulness for. It'll help remind me later of all the big and little blessings I need to remember more fully. Knowing that I'm striving for daily postings keeps me on my toes of recognizing ALL my blessings and making a mental note for my blog. I think this might be something I need to do more often, not just in November. I'm glad I'm doing it, nonetheless.
ReplyDeleteI want to teach my kids how the happy the hearts of others and themselves. After school I ask my kids what they did for someone else that day, and how did it make them feel. Their answers always include the word "happy!"
ReplyDeleteHi Saydi, This is sounds like such a beautiful book. Like a lot of people we build a thankful tree throughout the whole month. We start with few leaves here and there but as we learn to recognize what we are grateful for the tree becomes so full. Just last night my six year old heard the heater kick on and proclaimed "I'm so glad we have a heater to keep us warm." It warmed my heart to see her recognizing things that I sometimes take for granted.
ReplyDeleteThis is the first year we've started sharing something we were grateful for during our day and even though I have to do lots of encouraging most nights, it seems like it's helping all of us. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteI am always saying quiet 'grateful prayers' when going about my busy day and try to keep a gratitude journal throughout the year. We also do a Thanksgiving tree as a family which has always been fun to look at the answers over the years.
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ReplyDeleteI found your blog! What a great book...I have truly been trying to focus on how grateful I am for my little guys. There have been a lot of sadness around, so I want to remember the things I am most grateful for!
ReplyDeleteI need to work on being better at sending thank you notes and encourage my children to do the same.
ReplyDeleteI just got a new church calling that has me very overwhelmed with three small children. The wise sister who held this calling before me gave me a journal and suggested that I write down three things each day that I feel grateful for. Holy cow! It's been a game changer! It's made me realize how much help I receive daily- from friends, my children, and even heaven itself. Our family spends Monday nights in November coloring paper leaves and turkeys and writing our blessings on them. We pile them all in a beautiful pitcher (to symbolize our overflowing blessings) and read them all on Thanksgiving morning. Then we sing our two favorite Thanksgiving hymns and say a special prayer of gratitude. It has truly changed how we feel on Thanksgiving.
ReplyDeleteI loathe fall, because it means summer ends and because it is dark sooner. So to see the beauty in it, we did a classic last Sunday - we did a little hike in a forest to see the beautiful coloured leaves. Lesson: Look for the littlest beauty in everything.
ReplyDeleteWe do a thankful tree during Nov.
ReplyDeleteOn Charity's suggestion I found your blog and I am thankful for that. I still have my joy school lessons from the '80's and they taught me how to be grateful . Thank you for the time you and your family take to share joy and happiness in family life.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite tradition is just being with family! Also, my husband and I started the thankful tree I found on your sister Shawni's blog. I love anything that helps cultivate an attitude of gratitude in our home and sometimes too-busy lives.
ReplyDeleteI try to show gratitude every day, all day, just by constantly Thanking God for my many blessings. I'm trying to teach this to our kids each day on the way to school. We pray out loud in the van thanking God for food in tummies, healthy bodies, the gift of learning, for our teachers, our school, our home, etc etc. Our list is long, but I want them to not take any of these things for granted! At dinner our kids bless the food, and I love that they naturally start the prayer by Thanking God. I think that gratitude really is the key to happiness.
ReplyDeleteLove all the comments. This month, I have been reminding my son as he jumps out of the car for school, "go forth and spread joy!" He always turns his head and grins at me. Later we recount all the joy we have found in our day.
ReplyDeleteHi!!
ReplyDeleteI have started a gratitude journal that I plan on continuing throughout the year so I can look back on it when I am having a not so good day!
I have been reminded about gratitude by my almost three year old. She has been slow to start talking, but this week, she has started saying, "Tanks mommy!" to EVERYTHING I do. Wipe her bum, wipe her nose, do her hair, get her dinner, put on her shoes, buckle her carseat, etc. I get to hear those sweet words. It has helped me remember better to be grateful for all the little things too!
ReplyDeleteI am so happy to see so many comments about being grateful. I was just speaking about the word grateful to someone today. Are thankful and grateful the same thing? Makes me ponder....I have become so GRATEFUL for so many things in my life and am using that word more and more. I love your ideas on writing 3 things each day!!!
ReplyDeleteSo glad I saw this. I didn't even know your parents had published this new book! Sure love them. I'm looking forward to buying it. And I'm working on telling my children and husband at bed each night something I am thankful for that they did, or are. Always an inspiration Saydi. Love your thankful heart.
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